HumidCity

from a hotal room in los angeles (hurrication day 2)

alright, here we go again. we all know the premise. a storm of biblical proportions, except instead of the misadventures of noah, this time we’re visiting the lonely onan. he’s the guy who got in trouble for spilling his seed in the sand. hopefully, this exercise in paranoia will prove to be just like onan’s sin ~ masturbation.  people get excited, breathe heavy, moan, groan,,, it’s over soon, you breathe a sign of relief and clean up,,, realizing guiltily it was highly overrated (or was it?)

blog this!

phfred@mcnawlins.com

 

i.

a man in lakeview was shot and killed by nopd after he first threatened fema workers who were “evicting” him from his fema trailer and then brandished a gun at police officers. the police claim he was a mentally ill man who was “off his meds,” but I wonder if that’s any reason to play judge, jury and executioner. mentally ill? who isn’t nowadays? shouldn’t law enforcement be handling (and shooting) the real crooks, you know, the ones in the suits who put the city in formaldehyde–infested fema trailers to begin with?

ii.

meanwhile my trailer eviction notice from the city of new orleans sits unanswered and ignored on my countertop as do my prescriptions. hmmm… go ahead punk…do you feel lucky?

iii.

my pothole is now the home for ducks PIC HERE… well, at least it was for a few hours. does that mean it’s no longer a pothole, but rather a topographical body of water to be registered with rand and mcnally? unfortunately or fortunately, the baby ducks were rescued ala’ evicted by a concerned neighbor who thought a) they might get hit by a car, b) they might be eaten by pigeons, c) they might get shot by the nopd. unfortunately, the mother was thrown into a quacking seizure for the next three hours (situationally induced mental illness) … and the ducklings probably won’t survive the night in unneeded and unrequested human care.

I wonder what we can learn from these random accidents of unkindness?

sic itur ad astra?

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phfred@notthat.com

THIS IS A SERIOUS BLOG. I WILL BREAK FROM MY AFOREMENTIONED ACERBIC E.E. CUMMINGS LEANINGS AND ATTEMPT TO FOLLOW SOME SEMBLANCE OF GRAMMATICAL POSTURING.

I just got a rejection letter from Tulane University’s Upward Bound Program. 

It reads:

> Good Morning,
> We have had an opportunity to review all applicant
> materials,credentials, education, and levels of professional
> expertise in secondary education over the past four days.
> We are very impressed with the high level of academic and
> professional experience you have to offer our students. As a
> results oriented program, we at this time however we have identified
> the candidates who’s experiences and expertise in high school college
> preparatory instruction best meet the needs of the students in our program.
> Thank you again for your interest and we wish you the best in your
> search to make a difference this summer.

My response:

Thanks for your time and consideration. By the
way, one of the main problems on the ACT is pronoun
use. “Who’s experiences” should be “whose
experiences.” Touche?

p.h. fred

“getting best results on test prep for over a decade”

====================================

AN AFTERTHOUGHT:
Perhaps I should have mentioned the run-on sentences, the lack of both commas and semicolons, and the misplaced modifiers (my expertise in the past four days?). Then again, perhaps I didn’t get the job because I was (and still am) an overqualified ***** **** applying for a job in a federally funded program. Call me paranoid? Welcome to McNawlins… can I take your order please?

NOW BLOG THIS!

p.h. fred (phfred@notthat.com)

well after 2 years in a fema trailer, give or take a few half lives and a couple of missed doses of depakote, i’m finally back in a house. so armed with a contempt for capitalization and punctuation, let me hit the ground punning… as  my head begins to spin into puddles of creativity, i realize the biggest problem with post-k new orleans or post reagan politics isn’t reality, it’s all perception.  my jazz fest experience as a performer made me think that we weren’t in the small print…. all those people opened up for us,,,,  when i recently donated one of my paintings to the grace house for an auction, i didn’t consider myself a starving artist with only 3 pieces sold in my 44 years, rather score now is fred 3, van gogh 1.  

it’s all in the perception… the spin… the lie even.

as i sat recently blurry eyed and pumped with manic endorphins, a piece of “lie” and perception hit me or kicked me or fondled me… it has to do with the reason i’m only recently in a house and may be back in a trailer or a boat or homeless when hurricane season arrives on my freshly unpainted doorstep august or thereabouts: 7400 Leake Ave, New Orleans, LA 70118???? leake ave?  LEAKE?  LEAK?   oh yes, the physical address of the U.S. CORP OF ENGINEERS… c’est levee!  well, as i investigated further the PUBLIC AFFAIRS dept of the corps (or is that corpse????) no longer uses 7400 Leake Ave, New Orleans, LA 70118 as their addy…. they got a P.O. BOX… go figure… you can’t sue ‘em, you can’t find ‘em, BUT YOU CAN STILL BLAME ‘EM.  I suggest they get a new physical addy on TUPPERWARE ST or WATERPROOF RD or ME CULPA DR or better yet on WE ADMIT IT WE F’D UP ROYALLY AND WE PROMISE WE WON”T LET IT HAPPEN AGAIN BLVD.

a p.o. box? you gotta be kiddin’ me!

BLOG THIS!

p.h. fred (phfred@notthat.com)

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