Due Process? No thanks, I’m trying to quit.

Dec 16, 2005 by

Louisiana is allowing lawyers from other states to come on in and practice on a pro bono basis for a limited time only. Neato! That should help get a few things done …

… as long as your needs don’t involve criminal law. Check Section B1 of the LA Supreme Court’s order: no free crim law assistance allowed. That’s right, all you scruffy-bearded public defenders can leave your herringbone sportcoat with the elbow-patches right where it is — hanging on the coatrack next to your liberal agenda masquerading as concern for the f*cked. Can’t rightly get mah yard cleaned up without a lil’ free help from our lawfully arrested niggraz, nah can we Colonel?

(Third-World-grade social inequities aside, why would the state let in lawyers to practice private law — that’s the part of Louisiana’s law that’s based on the “Napoleonic Code” y’all always hear about — that they couldn’t possibly be familiar with, and not allow them to practice under the criminal code, which is based on old-fashioned off-with-his-head English common law that every law student in the country learns their first year?)

Don’t think I’m all gripe. There’s plenty vitally necessary private law work to be done. For starters, over 9,000 members of ACORN can’t find the titles to their properties, possibly their only legal claim to their homes. But, damn … I mean, DAMN … Would things be any worse — could they be? — if everybody arrested since the hurricane got the Gideon-style Due Process that’s due them? Or is Chief Justice Calogero just smart enough to anticipate that the state attorneys will get their asses kicked by a legion of hyper-competent blue-state carpetbaggers if he doesn’t protect them?

I’ll be back in a few days and I can’t wait to find out.


Related Posts


Share This