Undercover Brother
I posted this over at First Draft on Friday so it has some extra exposition but I thought I’d bring it here as well. I have been told by some of my sillier friends that Undercover Brother isn’t a bad movie. I plan to test that theory. Btw, I’m working on an election wrap up post. It should be up in the next few days.
You’re probably wondering why I’m going on about a bad 2002 movie that I’ve never seen, not even at 2AM on HBO-Malakatude. Here’s why. It was mentioned Friday at the corruption trial of former Mayor C Ray Nagin aka the Walking Id (stole that nickname from my old buddy Liprap.) It seems that C Ray is a fan of the movie, if, that is, it has any adherents:
Among the messages was one where Nagin advised Meffert not to deal with businessman Aaron Bennett because he talked too much, including to then-TP investigative reporter Gordon Russell.
There was also a message where Nagin was excited after finding out that Meffert had scored some tickets to the Saints’ 2007 NFC Championship game.
“You the man, and has always been my undercover brother.”
The undercover brother in question is the guy below who is one of the pastiest white boys you will ever see;
Dat da man? Apparently, he was to the grammatically challenged Nagin. Not any more. Meffert rolled over on his former boss/hero a few years back and ended his life as C Ray’s puppet, which was one reason the NOLA blogger Dambala dubbed him Muppet. Muppet was awestruck by C Ray’s hipster douchebaggery and jumped like a bug-eyed frog every time his master’s voice told him to. Muppet’s time on the witness stand was more entertaining than a barrel of crazy monkeys as is best documented by this tweet by the aforementioned mild mannered Journalistic bulldog, Gordon Russell:
Pin msg from Meffert to Nagin: “Gordon Russell up my ass and in my shit 24/7.” #nagintrial
— Gordon Russell (@GordonRussell1) January 31, 2014
and this instant classic:
Meffert: “As things started to come out, I got increasingly worried. It was all kind of Velcroing to me.” #nagintrial
— Gordon Russell (@GordonRussell1) January 31, 2014
Velcroing is a new concept to me and a totally preposterous one, but this trial has so many farcical elements that it’s hard to pick and choose. That’s why I’m rambling and weaving all over the place like a drunken monkey. Hmm, another monkey image. Shock the monkey to life.
The other major witness today was crooked contratctor Frank Fucking Fradella. FFF was the dirt bag who bribed the Mayor in order to get work from the city. Part of the scam involved a company Nagin owned with his spawn callled-get ready-Stone Age Granite. It conjures up images of C Ray guest starring on an episode of The Flintstones and driving off with Fred to a lodge meeting or some such shit. Hmm, now that I think of it, Muppet was Barney to Ray Ray’s Fred. Yabba-dabba-do, man. Nagin says man a lot man but seems incapable of manning up. Peyton Manning? He’s up in Jersey hanging out with David Wildstein and Governor Fat Fuck. Maybe not since the former is flipping on the latter. This post is getting more and more like an overstuffed sofa every minute. That’s why they call me Shecky, folks.
Since I’m posting tweets (I haven’t got the hang of doing it all nice and fancy with an avatar ) here’s one from someone who is near and dear to me. In the immortal words of Bob Newhart, that, that, that would be me:
C Ray was as incompetent a crook as he was a Mayor. Taking checks personally? What a maroon. #nagintrial
Yes, that’s right, C Ray was not only on the take, but took the take himself. Try saying that 3 times after a few beers. I picture the eerily vain Nagin, taking the cash and then pausing at the mirror to buff his shiny but empty head. Unlike much of the post this is realistic. I was around C Ray on 3 or 4 occasions and every single time he preened and primped like a teenybopper before the prom. It’s as if Pete Townshend wrote Go To The Mirror for the Walking Id.
Back to the trial. The prosecution had a good day. Their case looks strong and Judge Ginger Berrigan (Clinton appointee and former card carrying ACLU lawyer) runs a tight ship but lifted her ban on ELECTRONIC DEVICES so the trial was live tweeted. It was a good day to sit at the computer and watch the Good Ship C Ray slowing sinking under the weight of his arrogance, stupidity, bad taste in movies, and failed granite business. And that brings me to the last tweet of the post:
Did Nagin take his undercover brother for granite? #nagintrial
— Adrastos (@Adrastosno) January 31, 2014